I dive headfirst into unhappiness upon arousal from slumber. Unintentionally grinding myself into ash before the day that has begun. My thought process attacks my inner being and I of course falter at the mercy of the boulders. I try to keep balance in spit of these things, but I am just a mere child. When things get difficult, I lose my sense of self, and I lose everything around me. Anxiety knocks at my door. I answer because I know it leads to more problems. I do what I know. I know what I do.
But I will never know what I want.